I am choosing to let Christ carry the burden I have tried to carry for so long.
I am choosing to believe the Word when it says that it is a bigger blessing to be single, then it is to be in a relationship. What a blessing that I get to seek and pursue Christ and Christ alone. He is the one whom my heart desires to make happy.
I am choosing to be okay with things not making sense, with lacking answers, clarity, and understanding.
I am choosing to spend ample time with Jesus and to actually spend time doing things that make me happy; foreign concept huh? We so often view the Christian walk as doing things for other people all day long. While it is great in theory, Jesus often spent time in solitude with His father, He spent time doing what He knew He needed to fill Himself up again when the world drained Him.
I am choosing to push myself to do bigger things that I once never thought I could do.
I am choosing to believe in myself and believe that I am worth something.
I am choosing to believe that I was put on this Earth to bring into existence a plan and purpose that no one except myself could do. (Woah). I am believing that my life was not a coincidence or mistake and that I am enough. Even if I am not enough for people at times, I am enough for my Heavenly Father.
I am choosing to move forward (even when I don't want to) and press on (even when I don't feel like I can).
I am choosing to believe in God's big, perfect plan, and pursue joy and peace even when it does not seem obtainable.
I am choosing, in short, to trust God.
I am also choosing to be exactly where I am at.
I am choosing to be weak when I need to be weak and to praise God for weakness (if I had it all together, I wouldn't have to wake up every morning and trust God to get me through the day).
Also, I am choosing to praise God the days I feel truly strong and full of the fruits of the Spirit (it is those days I really see God's power at work, I am only strong through Him. I can do nothing in it of my own strength).
I am choosing to not pretend or fake it. I am choosing to be who I am because at the end of the day, God's opinion is what matters. As clique as that is. It is true.
This is where I'm at.
This is not a declaration that I have it all together or am currently succeeding at these things.
This is a declaration that I am simply trying.
